I don't know about you, but there are certain moments in the day, mainly when i am subjected to the Tv media, that i find myself attacked y the sudden and unprovoked urge to get something new. It may be a new phone, a new bag, to sign up to a new website, or eat chocolate (thats a constant) or something like that. but they come on so fast and the thoughts are so powerful. I have come to now realise they are just flashes and to ignore them through years of reflection and meditation centred around how empty material possessions are, but still they hit me. From this i realise why so many people are in debt- because they dont realise its just seeds planted by the media blooming by a little nudge from who knows what or where, and ignorant people just go with whatever their minds tell them to do and thus impulse buy, feel the buyers guilt and feel depressed because they are in debt. I agree sometimes its nice, but my god i have had to work SO hard to train myself not to go with my impulses and buy crao, but i still want to and that sucks! I try to maintain a mindframe of "Do i really need this? How will it better my life and the lives around me?" If i cant come up with a good anwer to these questions I try not to buy it. I have found this has saved me a hell of a lot of money, but its so hard in this commercial society where everybody is constantly presured to buy buy BUY to fit in and be a better person. but remember when we were kids and were content with our favorite stick, stone or tree? How i wish we could return to those days cause i think so many people would be so much happier. I have seen first hand how money can tear families apart and i hate society for that. If we were all a little more content with what is on the inside and happier with ourselves we would not need all the clutter to hide how much we hate or do not know ourselves. I mean - how much better do you feel when you have cleared out your warbrode? Why not do that with your life or your mind?
Thursday 22 January 2009
Why do I always want: surviving in a consumer-centred society
I don't know about you, but there are certain moments in the day, mainly when i am subjected to the Tv media, that i find myself attacked y the sudden and unprovoked urge to get something new. It may be a new phone, a new bag, to sign up to a new website, or eat chocolate (thats a constant) or something like that. but they come on so fast and the thoughts are so powerful. I have come to now realise they are just flashes and to ignore them through years of reflection and meditation centred around how empty material possessions are, but still they hit me. From this i realise why so many people are in debt- because they dont realise its just seeds planted by the media blooming by a little nudge from who knows what or where, and ignorant people just go with whatever their minds tell them to do and thus impulse buy, feel the buyers guilt and feel depressed because they are in debt. I agree sometimes its nice, but my god i have had to work SO hard to train myself not to go with my impulses and buy crao, but i still want to and that sucks! I try to maintain a mindframe of "Do i really need this? How will it better my life and the lives around me?" If i cant come up with a good anwer to these questions I try not to buy it. I have found this has saved me a hell of a lot of money, but its so hard in this commercial society where everybody is constantly presured to buy buy BUY to fit in and be a better person. but remember when we were kids and were content with our favorite stick, stone or tree? How i wish we could return to those days cause i think so many people would be so much happier. I have seen first hand how money can tear families apart and i hate society for that. If we were all a little more content with what is on the inside and happier with ourselves we would not need all the clutter to hide how much we hate or do not know ourselves. I mean - how much better do you feel when you have cleared out your warbrode? Why not do that with your life or your mind?
Wednesday 21 January 2009
Why am i a vegetarian?
I have recently become a vegeterian and so many people, including myself, have been asking why? And it has really got me thinking...why have i done it?
I have been reading the PeTA magazines and they seem very bias obviously against eating meat but what i dont understand is why do they have to be so blantant - when i was reading it i felt like it was reminding people why they became vegetarians and reinforcing them and telling people it was ok to be a veggie, but to be honest i dont need to see pictures of tortured pigs and hens and other fam animals to make me a veggie - to be honest i can't look at the images and thats why i became a veggie! I guess the images are designed to provoke and get people to act which i really do agree with.
So there are many resons one can become veggie: animal rights, hate the taste of meat, religion, health, family etc. To be honest i think i did it because i wanted to do something which meant something - does that make sense? I think i feel i have just been doing what i should be doing, eating what i have always eaten and so on, and i wanted to change to make a staement to myself I think. Also it is so important to Buddhist religion. But its so odd - now i am a veggie i cant stand the thought of having dead flesh in my mouth and chewing and chewing that body that used to be alive and breathin and dreaming and loving.
I cannot come close to say how much i love being a veggie - i have got a great cookbook, a veggie nosh book for students (so its right up my street and its so easy to use!) and because of that i am cooking one meal from scratch a week, and oh my god i am have found so many foods i have never considered. i know how to make scrambled eggs and omlettes, and oh my god i made the best chocolate chilli cinnimon chilli - here's the recipe:
Angel's Chocolate chilli cinnnamon vegi chilli (makes 3 meals)
- One 500g bag of veggi mince
- One can chopped toms
- One jar hot chilli sauce
- One can red kidney beans
- 1/2 tube tomato purree
- 2 tablespoons chilli (or more if you like it hot!)
- 2 tablespoons chocolate powder
- 200g wholemeal pasta
Great hot and cold....mmmmmmmmmm!
So yeah its great - making fruity rice next week. Yummy!
My goals
EDUCATION
I have always held education and learning as the greatest gifts this society has to offer us, and i love being in education. I am currently a second year candidate on a PhD in Film Studies, focusing on Japanese horror. But i am always looking to the future as i do love to make plans. So here are my educational plans for my life:
I have always held education and learning as the greatest gifts this society has to offer us, and i love being in education. I am currently a second year candidate on a PhD in Film Studies, focusing on Japanese horror. But i am always looking to the future as i do love to make plans. So here are my educational plans for my life:
June 2010: Finish my PhD
Till April 2011: Learn basic Japanese script
April - Oct 2011: Do Japanese Language Course: A 6-month beginner's course at Sheffiled Hallam Uni (http://www.shef.ac.uk/seas/dlc/jlc.html)
Oct 2011 - June 2014: Do the MA in Japanese Language and Society by Distance Learning at Sheffield Hallam Uni (http://www.shef.ac.uk/seas/dlc/jls.html)
Oct 2014 - June 2017: MA in Advanced Japanese Studies (Gender, Diversity and Citizenship)by Distance Learning at Sheffield Hallam (http://www.shef.ac.uk/seas/dlc/ajs_gdc.html)
...and after this:
- Learn sign language
- Learn to play the cello
CAREER
At the moment I am Programme Leader of Media at a college, and have been for the past five years . Its a great job with great kids and teaching is the best job in the world i believe, but I am very ambitious so i want to advance.
- Work at Sheffield Hallam University in the East Asian centre
- Get position as firstly lecturer, then senior lecturer, then Reader in Film Studies specialising in Japanese horror, Japanese culture and language
- Work part time translating Japanese documents
- Work within Japan in education
- Publish books within a university system
I am writing these for myself and for my friends and family so if something happens I want them to know what i was going to do, and also so i can look back and see how i did!
Tuesday 20 January 2009
My reasons for doing this
Well this is my first blog. I am not too sure why i have signed up for this. I keep a journal as a way of venting my inner thoughts and it helps me process my thoughts in a calm and chronological manner and as such i can see the stupidity behind them and most times the emotions all fade away. I think i am doing an online blog is 1) curiosity and 2) to get my feelings out there to gage how other people react, as I seem to be very different to most people around me apart from my husband, but even he and I are far apart in some areas. I think it is my total belief and adoption of Buddhist principles which basically are: Learn to do good, cease to do harm, control the mind and benefit others.
When I was a teenager coming into womanhood things were very very hard as it is with most teenagers of my generation, and I sought so hard for another way upon realising how wrong the may i had been brought up with was (and being shown the light by my husband). But he just told me to 'be nice', but i needed more than that - i needed guidance. For too long i had lived believing consequences to negative actions were fictional, that home arguments in which kids were dragged into were part and parcel of everyday home life, and that all parents argued, and that all kids were depressed and cried in their rooms. But upon leaving and floating from shit hole to shit hole and from trouble to trouble, eventually i was blessed to meet my husband and he stood by me and reprogrammed me, showing me what i thought to be right was very wrong. But it was finding Buddhism and the guidance it offered me through its teachings that showed me HOW to be different. Before it i knew i was wrong and that i needed to change, but i did not know how, and the New Kadampa Tradition's teachings explained why i was how i was and how to go about changing it.
So, returning to my original point - I think i am writing this to Share my views about the world, my work, my beliefs and my fears in a hope that i can connect with others who share my views and at the same time maybe help change people's negative perceptions and delusions as both my husband and Buddhist teachings did for me. O and i just want to RANT! :)
When I was a teenager coming into womanhood things were very very hard as it is with most teenagers of my generation, and I sought so hard for another way upon realising how wrong the may i had been brought up with was (and being shown the light by my husband). But he just told me to 'be nice', but i needed more than that - i needed guidance. For too long i had lived believing consequences to negative actions were fictional, that home arguments in which kids were dragged into were part and parcel of everyday home life, and that all parents argued, and that all kids were depressed and cried in their rooms. But upon leaving and floating from shit hole to shit hole and from trouble to trouble, eventually i was blessed to meet my husband and he stood by me and reprogrammed me, showing me what i thought to be right was very wrong. But it was finding Buddhism and the guidance it offered me through its teachings that showed me HOW to be different. Before it i knew i was wrong and that i needed to change, but i did not know how, and the New Kadampa Tradition's teachings explained why i was how i was and how to go about changing it.
So, returning to my original point - I think i am writing this to Share my views about the world, my work, my beliefs and my fears in a hope that i can connect with others who share my views and at the same time maybe help change people's negative perceptions and delusions as both my husband and Buddhist teachings did for me. O and i just want to RANT! :)
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